A Rant Against Weight Loss Spam

I've gotten a lot of weird emails since I started my blog. I suppose that's just an inevitable side effect of throwing my name (and email) out into the wide abyss of the Internet. I've been invited to join numerous dating sites (apparently a site especially for love-thirsty farmers does exist), have won dozens of contests (cruises and male shaving blades, mostly) and several offers to increase the size of my "package" - and not a Love for Food package!

But none of those emails bother me as much as the typical weight loss spam.

Three of the many offers...

Sometimes it's from magazines I actually enjoy, like Runner's Magazine with a catchy subject line like "Run off 10 lbs now!" Other times, it's the odd sports drink, magic pill, or diet plan. Logically, I know that these companies are only doing what they can to gain - money, that is. Emotionally, I have a couple reply emails I wish I could spend back. Like:

Why assume that someone who blogs about healthy eating automatically wants to lose weight?

Heck, why assume everyone - especially those with XX chromosomes - has pounds they need, or even want, to lose?

Every girl wants to lose weight? I don't think so!

Does that money-back-guarantee cover the time spent analyzing every inch and dip of flesh in the mirror? Or the towels drenched with sweat after forced hours at the gym?

Will your product - which promises to give me the legs of an Amazonian princess, abs of a Victoria Secret Model and metabolism of a supercharged hummingbird - make me happy too?

And most importantly: Why have I received one or two weight-loss emails a day for the last two years and not one about gaining strength, confidence or weight?

My kind of email caption ;)

For that last question, a few answers come to mind. Because more people "need" to lose weight than gain it; because society usually finds slim legs and defined collarbones more attractive than muscles or a smile; and maybe because it isn't as easy to promise a "quick fix" to self esteem as fitting into a lower jean size.

I wish loving my body - at my pre and my post celiac size - was as easy as clicking an email link or paying a low price of $29.99. In fact, I wish that the ultimate goals of weight loss that these ads often (implicitly or explicitly) promise like confidence or finding love (with self and others) were that easy.

Computers can help...but rarely cure!

And maybe that's the main reason why I hate weight-loss gurus preaching to me via email. To anyone whose lives have been transformed for the better with a click of the mouse, I say, awesome! I'm happy for you! But to the others who feel more like gazelle being hunted on a digital savanna...

You're beautiful the way you are - even if you have some pounds you still want to lose, gain or sculpt. And maybe the first step toward change, besides some gym time and new recipes, is exercising your right to click those weight loss emails into the trash without a second thought.

*Also found at RunningwithSpoon's link party!*

What's your least favored version of unsolicited mail? Weirdest or funniest e mail you've got ever obtained? Comment under!

Mustaqim Jaed

Saya Seorang Yang Hoby Menulis Dan Menggambar.

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