8 (Hilariously Accurate) Reasons to Date Someone with Celiac Disease
Everyone has their image of the perfect significant other. Tall, dark and handsome? Blue eyed, blond-haired, and long-legged? This week before Valentine's Day, though, I'm setting it straight.
Cause, really, everyone should want to date a celiac! Don't believe me? Here are eight (hilariously true) ways that your life gets 100% better when you start courting someone with celiac disease...
I remember laughing when my doctor first explained that, after being diagnosed with celiac disease, I'd have to avoid gluten for the rest of my life. Sure, part of that reaction was shock, but I blame the other half on the silly sounding terms that now reign my life. I mean, "Celiac?" "Gluten?" Not everyone gets to have a cool name like that stamped on their medical records.
Just yesterday, my boyfriend, Nick, received his latest spelling lesson. "Celiac" for people living in the US and "coeliac" for our European counterparts. Insert "o" for "over there," as I like to think. My friends always joke that dating in college is like adding another 6 unit class. With a celiac girlfriend, I'd bump that up another 2.
Benefits of Dating a Celiac #2: You get all the free gluten free samples your celiac significant other has too much of.
Regular readers of my blog may remember my review of Foster Farms - also know as the day when I had 96 gluten free corn dogs stuffed in my dorm freezer, communal fridge, and even in the maid's mini-cooler in the upstairs laundry room. Months later, my fridge at home is still quite the corn dog treasure trove.
And because I'm not a huge corn dog fan, guess who gets a box every time I visit home? All the guys in rockin' the Wiley dorm rooms. No complaints so far.
Benefits of Dating a Celiac #3: You don't need to worry as much about feeding your significant other.
Like I've mentioned in previous posts, celiac disease tends to bring out the inner Girl Scout in me. Meaning that, besides really wanting cookies, I'm always prepared. When I spent Super Bowl weekend with Nick's family, I brought a backpack of books, clothes and hygiene products.
The huge bag in my other hand? Nothing but food in the form of 4 Tupperware lunches and dinners, a jar of chia seed pudding, 1/2 pound of mixed raw veggies and dip, a mix of Oatless Oatmeal, sunbutter, mixed seeds and fruit.
I ate well that weekend, I'd say.
Benefits of Dating a Celiac #4: You'll get to eat Chipotle every date night.
When we started dating, one of the first questions people asked me was, "So...where do you guys go to eat?"
Luckily for his taste buds and our wallets, a Chipotle is plopped down only a few blocks from my school. We spent our first date trying to analyze the meaning of wooden artwork hanging above our two-person table. Now, unless it's a Chick Fil A kind of week, we always know where our date night is going to be.
Benefits of Dating a Celiac #5: You'll never get another cavity.
One of the first serious conversations with my present boyfriend focused on dental hygiene, i.e. the need for him to brush his tooth post-meal so kissing wouldn't kill me. We've been dating almost 6 months now, and, as I mentioned last week, you better bet his dentist is going to thank me.
Plus, whenever I need a good joke for new friends, admitting that a toothbrush is the third person in our relationship always breaks the ice.
Benefits of Dating a Celiac #6: You'll learn how to read package labels.
A couple days ago, Nick and I were soaking in the California sun before our morning class. Grabbing his packaged lunch from the caf, he pulled out his BBQ chicken wrap, flipped it over to the label, and nodded. "Yep, wheat, gluten. This would kill you."
Don't worry. The thought of my possible death didn't damper his appetite.
Benefits of Dating a Celiac #7: Your GF girl or guy probably knows how to cook...
...or at least warm up some gluten free chicken fingers or frozen pizza. 
Pre-celiac, my kitchen skills were pretty limited. I could microwave a mean baked potato, pack a lunch and heat up a chicken pattie...but that was about it. Now I'm cooking all my own meals while kicking butt at 17 units of classes.
And while many people still wrinkle their noses at "gluten-free," you better bet they drool when I'm cooking (or blending a stunning smoothie) in the dorm kitchen!
Benefits of Dating a Celiac, #8: If you accommodate our celiac quirks, you'll always be appreciated.
Even though I've been a part of the celiac family for over a year now, food guilt still hits me at random times. I feel bad when the maid offers me part of her lunch and I don't know how to say, "Gluten makes my stomach explode" in Spanish. I hate it when friends try to cook a gluten free meal, but I can't eat it because of cross contamination. Or because it contains other ingredients my stomach has learned to hate (dairy, I'm looking at you!).
So whenever my buds let me pick where we eat, I'm thankful. Whenever I hear a toothbrush buzzing, I appreciate it. And whenever someone wants to be educated about celiac disease, but doesn't define me by my condition, they've won my heart.
So happy early Valentine's Day, everybody - celiacs, celiac lovers, and gluten lovers alike! Dating a celiac has its challenges - a picky stomach, post-gluten zombification, and quirks that make people laugh out loud. But, at least in my experience, dating a celiac can still be pretty sweet.
What's your cross-to this point night eating place? Any more celiac quirks that affect your love lifestyles? Comment beneath!
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